I want to start by talking about the fundamental idea that undercuts everything whenever we talk about “game”.
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It’s so fundamental that I just don’t think you can be good UNTIL you understand this basic principle.
Logic is a slave to emotion.
Did you get that? Logic is a SLAVE to emotion.
Whenever people talk about emotions, you hear things like happiness, sadness, jealousy, excitement, hate, anger, melancholy, and so on. We get bombarded with music and movies that inspire all kinds of different “emotions” in us.
But in the end, emotion is a FEELING. A literal FEELING inside your body. And that kind of feeling comes in two flavours: pleasure and pain.
That’s why your hand reaches out for that chocolate bar – because of the good feeling you know (or think) it’s going to create in you. It’s the same reason why a lot of people hate going to work – because they know the bad feeling they’re going to feel when they get there.
Sounds a little simple, right? Let’s go deeper.
Emotion is something that’s existed long before our brains had the faculty to generate, let alone USE, logic. So our brains are actually hardwired to operate on emotive cues. That’s why people have to go to University to LEARN about critical thinking, because it’s not something that’s naturally occurring.
In contrast, we’re BORN with the ability to feel emotions. (Actually some of us aren’t – they’re called psychopaths. Look it up.)
Haven’t you ever wondered why it’s so damn hard to do the “right” thing? Because logic is emotion’s little bitchboy. He does whatever emotion tells him to do.
That’s why some women fall for “bad boys” or “douchebags” – because they inspire EMOTION. Do you really think those women are so stupid they can’t see that dating these guys might be a BAD IDEA? Actually, they’re quite the opposite. The amount of mental effort they have to expend to rationally justify dating a guy like that is IMMENSE.
If you have friends like this you might even lay it out for them.
“Why do you date that guy? He’s ugly, doesn’t have a job, treats you like crap, and has a list of criminal convictions that would make Jake the Muss sweat.”
Response?
“You don’t know him like I do.”
“He sees me for who I really am.”
“He can change.”
It’s actually really painful to watch. It’s even more painful if you also ask “Why don’t you go out with me instead?” Now that’s a tragedy. Or at least a bad comedy.
Now, do you know a friend who has EVERYTHING going for them, but just can’t seem to get the girl? Maybe he wears a nice watch, has cool clothes, drives a fancy car, and talks about his freehold property in Remuera. Hell, maybe that’s YOU. It’s because you can’t LOGICALLY CONVINCE a girl to go out with you (except one kind – they’re called gold-diggers).
And do you know WHY you can’t logically convince a girl to sleep with you? Because logic is a SLAVE to emotion. Emotion makes the decisions. EMOTION cracks the whip. And logic follows obediently in its wake...
It’s not all bad though. I know a lot of guys in this who aren’t very good looking. I know one guy that looks a bit like one of those toy trolls you used to get when you were a kid. He inspires so much positive emotion in women. They LOVE him. And do you know what they say about him?
“He’s so hot.”
“Really, what’s hot about him?”
“His eyes. They’re beautiful.”
Personally, I reckon he looks like a crack fiend.
But with these positive emotions, the girl feels the need to rationally justify why she’s feeling them. How does she do that? By telling herself that he’s hot.
There are a few maxims that get thrown around quite a lot in our line of work. I want you to think about them in the context of what we’ve been talking about:
Attraction is not a choice.
Change her mood, not her mind.
What you feel, she feels.
Take home message? Emotion is KING. If you can’t generate emotion, you can’t generate DIDDLYSQUAT. In my next article, I’ll talk about what steps you can take to start generating emotion when you’re talking to that beautiful woman.
Until then, take it easy.
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